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A version of this article was first published in May 2022.
2012 (M, 158mins) Directed by Roland Emmerich ***
Roland Emmerich has made a career out of destruction.
From Independence Day to this year’s Moonfall, via Godzilla and The Day After Tomorrow, the German-born director has delivered blockbusting box-office bonanzas by blowing stuff up.
When he tried to do something different, 2008’s partly New Zealand-shot prehistoric epic 10,000 BC for example, his Midas touch and, indeed, any semblance of film-making ability deserted him. But, in 2009, he came back with the mother of all disaster movies. This time, come hell AND high water, he was determined to destroy all civilisation.
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As well as the year, the title refers to the Western religious interpretation of the Mayan calendar that suggests a planetary alignment will herald the end of the world.
In Emmerich’s universe, the Earth has been suffering from increasing exposure to neutrinos from the Sun since 2009. Mutating into a new kind of nuclear particle, they have been rapidly heating up the Earth’s core. This initially results in increased numbers of mini-earthquakes, but scientists like Adrian Helmsley (Chiwetel Ejiofor) have done the projections and the prognosis is not good. The Earth’s crust is destabilising – and the planet will soon be become uninhabitable.
World leaders have been working on escape plans for a select few, but to avoid panic, they have kept these secret. But now events are happening more quickly than expected – and humanity’s survival is in doubt.
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Thematically, 2012 is essentially The Core, with a bigger budget and better effects. Nature stalks the characters like death in the Final Destination series.
With earthquakes, fireballs, tsunamis and mass destruction on a global scale, audiences are left in no doubt that this is Emmerich’s “magma” (sorry, “magnum”) opus.
2012 mixes elements of War of the Worlds, Armageddon, The Poseidon Adventure, Wall-E and Waterworld, while also borrowing tonally from Deep Impact.
Thematically, the film is essentially The Core, with a bigger budget and better effects. Nature stalks the characters like death in the Final Destination series.
The Towering Inferno-esque line-up of talent includes Eijofor (TV’s The Man Who Fall to Earth), John Cusack (1408), Thandiwe Newton (TV’s Westworld), Oliver Platt (Year One), Danny Glover (Lethal Weapon) and Woody Harrelson (Zombieland), with all more than capable of holding their own against wave upon wave of top-notch special effects.
Supplied/Stuff
If you put your brain in neutral while watching 2012, you can enjoy an unprecedented scale of beautifully rendered destruction and learn that science isn’t an exact science.
The middle section is a triumph of destruction over dramatic progression, yet our heroes still manage to elicit emotion even, while delivering Emmerich’s trademark cheese.
Despite its exuberance, 2012 comes with a few warnings. It sets a new standard for preposterousness, the story suffers from an economy of characters and a posterior-numbing 158-minute running time, and Emmerich still can’t come up with a credible resolution to his far-fetched ideas.
However, if you put your brain in neutral, you can enjoy an unprecedented scale of beautifully rendered destruction and learn that science isn’t an exact science.
2012 is now available to stream on Neon.
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